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Since her press tour promoting Pamela, Love Story and Love, Pamela, fans have wondered what Tommy Lee’s response to Pamela Anderson’s documentary and book have been, and where their relationship is now more than two decades after their divorce.
Pamela, an actress on the TV show Baywatch, and Tommy, the drummer for Mötley Crüe, met on New Year’s Eve 1994 at the club Sanctuary in Hollywood. He came up, grabbed me and licked my face,” she told Movieline in 1995. “I thought he was a cool, friendly, nice guy. I gave him my number.” Six weeks later, Tommy accompanied Anderson for a photoshoot in Cancun, Mexico. The two eloped four days into their trip and tattooed each other’s names on their ring fingers. Three years after their wedding, Pamela filed for divorce from Tommy on February 28, 1995. The filing came days after Tommy was charged with spousal and child abuse. The filing also came three years after the leak of Pamela and Tommy’s infamous sex tape, which she’s credited as one of their reasons their marriage fell apart.
Pamela detailed her marriage to Tommy and other relationships in her 2023 Netflix documentary, Pamela, A Love Story, and her memoir Love, Pamela. “I didn’t feel like I had a lot of respect,” Pamela said in her documentary about why she wanted to tell her story. “I had to make a career out of the pieces I had left.” She continued, I want to embrace the past, embrace the truth. My life is not a woe-is-me story. I’m not a victim. I put myself in crazy situations and survived them. As much pain as we can endure in our lives is kind of like the catalyst to all the great stuff…I’m grateful for all the experiences that I had and I don’t blame anybody for anything. I’m glad it happened.” So how did Tommy Lee respond to Pamela Anderson’s documentary and book? Read on how what we know about how Tommy Lee responded to Pamela Anderson’s documentary and book, and what she said about their marriage.
How did Tommy Lee respond to Pamela Anderson’s documentary?
How did Tommy Lee respond to Pamela Anderson’s documentary, Pamela, A Love Story, and book, Love, Pamela? In a TikTok video on February 4, 2023, Tommy’s wife, Brittany Furlan, revealed that Pamela’s ex-husband “couldn’t care less” about her documentary and book, and the criticism that’s come from them. “I’m lucky to have a really loving husband who honestly laughs all this stuff off and couldn’t care less,” she said.
Brittany’s TikTok came a week after TikTok user @thekylemarisa posted alleged texts between Pamela and Tommy, in which Pamela told Tommy he was her “one true love.” “I cant believe we filmed so much. Its heartbreaking (in a god way) – So much love. We were so happy. So cute you with the boys as babies and its really how papperazzi world tore us apart,” Pamela allegedly wrote. “Its very emotional and sweet. I only have good things to say about you – Esp in hindsight I realize I only had one true love – I never recovered.”
TMZ—which confirmed the texts were real and were sent to Tommy in January 2023 before the release of Pamela’s documentary and book—reported that Tommy didn’t respond to Pamela’s messages. A source close to Pamela told the site that Pamela wasn’t trying to get back together with Tommy and had no intention of breaking up his marriage to his Brittany. Instead, the texts were meant for Pamela to express her gratitude for her and Tommy’s history.
Another source close to Tommy, however, believed that Pamela was trying to get back with Tommy and claimed that she’d been repeatedly texting him since he proposed to Brittany in 2018, which Tommy doesn’t respond to. TMZ reported that Pamela had also texted Tommy flirty messages about how she still loves him and how she believes they will be together when they’re old, as well as apologies for things that have happened in their relationship in the past. A source also told TMZ that Tommy and Brittany find Pamela texts “triggering” and Tommy wants Pamela to move on and find someone of her own like he has.
In Love, Pamela, Pamela recalled a 1998 fight between her and Tommy that led to his arrest under spousal and child abuse charges. Pamela detailed that the “terrible night” started when Tommy was rocking on the floor telling her, “I want my wife back, I want my wife back,'” as a response to their declining marriage over their leaked sex tape. “At that point, I didn’t know what to do. And I just said, ‘I need some fucking help around here. You gotta grow up, it’s not about you anymore,'” she wrote.
She continued, “He grabbed the phone away from me, twisting my arm as I was holding Dylan in the other. My nail tore off, blood dripping down my arm. The kids were so frightened. I picked up Brandon, too, but he slid frantically down my leg and held on to it tight, hyperventilating.” Pamela then wrote that Tommy grabbed Brandon, who was 18 months at the time, and “threw me and Dylan into the wall.” “I was so scared that he was hurt—he was screaming and he was only seven weeks old. Tommy ran out the door with Brandon…I could barely breathe, trying to catch my breath through the tears. Panicked, I called 911,” she wrote. “I had to bifurcate the divorce because he wouldn’t sign the papers. He thought we could get through it. I just took my kids and was like, ‘No.’ It wasn’t a gray area for me. I was like, ‘You can’t do that,'” she said. Pamela also revealed that, once Tommy was released from jail, the couple had “secret meetings, breaking the restraining order,” but ultimately their relationship “didn’t last…neither of us could forgive the other, deep down.”
In Pamela, A Love Story, Pamela told Brandon how much she loved his father, “I really loved your dad for all the right reasons and I don’t think I’ve ever loved anybody else. It’s fucked.” “I never got over not being able to make it work with the father of my kids,” she said later in the documentary. She also explained that her feelings for Tommy may also be why she’s still single after five divorces. “I’d rather be alone than not be with the father of my kids,” she said. “It’s impossible to be with anybody else. But I don’t think I can be with Tommy either. It’s almost like a punishment.” in Love, Pamela, Pamela wrote that all her relationships after Tommy “paled in comparison.” “It was a losing battle. It wasn’t the others’ fault—they just had no shot. My relationship with Tommy may have been the only time I was ever truly in love,” she wrote.
As for how Brittany felt about Pamela’s documentary and book, Tommy’s wife revealed in her TikTok video that she’s “OK” despite the “mean things” commenters have told her as a result of Pamela’s documentary and book. “Hi guys, I just wanted to come on here to let you know that I’m OK because I know people have been checking on me, which is really nice and I’m good,” she said. ” Don’t worry, and don’t worry about all the people who are saying all the mean things that they’re saying. I don’t live in that world, so please don’t stress. Thank you to all the people who have been so sweet. We are only here for a certain amount of time, so I don’t sweat the comments from people who don’t know me or my relationship or anything like that, so I love everyone that’s been really kind and I’m sending love to those who have been unkind because I think they probably need it. It is what it is. It’s life I guess. ”
She continued, “Don’t worry about anything, and thank you to everyone who’s been sticking up for me and stuff like that. I leave my comments. If you feel like you want to get it out and say something mean to me or try to tear me down, please. Honestly, I have done so much self work that I realize where it’s coming from. People who say things to people where it’s coming from. With that said, I’m sending so much love out there to everyone, the good and the bad. Don’t worry about anything. I’ll be back to my continued program as usual very soon, so love you guys.”
In another TikTok video, Brittany seemed to shade Pamela and suggest that Tommy’s ex-wife wouldn’t care if she died. In the vidoe, Brittany used a “90s Pam Makeup” filter as she lip-synced someone saying, “Did she pass away? Aw, aw, hmm” as she acted unfazed while Tommy sat next to her. “Pam if I died,” she wrote over the video. She captioned the post, “Pls guys I gotta make jokes it’s how I cope.”
In an interview on The Howard Stern Show in 2023, Pamela confirmed that she had no negative feelings toward Brittany. “She’s good to him and I totally support that and think that’s great,” she said. “I hate to be annoying and going through this again, I’m sure she’s annoyed, but I respect their relationship and just glad he’s happy and has someone in his life.” She also told People at the time, “He has a wife, and obviously I respect that relationship, and he is very happy and I’m happy for him. Still, Pamela also told The Wall Street Journal at the time that she understands why Brittany would be “annoyed” by her memoir, Love, Pamela. “I’m sure it’s going to be annoying to his wife. I’d be annoyed,” she said.
Where are Pamela Anderson and Tommy Lee now?
Where are Pamela Anderson and Tommy Lee now? Pamela and Tommy confirmed they were on good terms in November 2021 when they attended the launch party for Swingers Club, Brandon’s fashion collaboration with Local Authority, in Los Angeles. In an interview with People in 2015, Pamela called Tommy the “love” of her “life.” “There was Tommy and then there was nobody else. He was the love of my life. We had a wild and crazy beginnings that was too much for both of us,” she said. “It really was love at first sight. I only knew him four days before I married him.” She continued, “I had beautiful children with him. My kids are grateful to be born out of true love. Everything else I was trying to piece together.” She also told the magazine at the time that she and Lee were friends. “We’re good friends, we’re getting better at co-parenting our kids,” she said. “He’s such a supporter of mine and I’m really happy we’re on such great terms.”
After her divorce from Tommy, Pamela married five more times. Her second marriage was to Kid Rock from 2006 to 2007. She then married movie producer Rick Salomon in October 2007 in Las Vegas. They annulled their marriage in February 2008. Anderson and Salomon got back together and married in 2014 before their divorce in 2015. Anderson’s fourth husband was movie producer Jon Peters whom she married in January 2020. Anderson, who claimed that she and Peters had never been legally married, split from him a month later in February 2020. Anderson’s fourth marriage was to her bodyguard Dan Hayhurst, whom she married on December 2020. They split a year later in January 2022.
Tommy, for his part, married Vine star Brittany Furlan in 2019. He was also married twice before his relationship with Pamela. His first wife was model Elaine Starchuk from 1984 to 1985. His second marriage was to actress Heather Locklear from 1986 to 1993. Both of Pamela and Tommy’s children work in the fashion and entertainment industry. Tommy and Pamela’s eldest son, Brandon, who launched his first fashion collection in 2021, had starred in movies like Sierra Burgess Is a Loser, Cosmic Sin and Zero Road, and was a cast member on MTV’s reality TV series, The Hills: New Beginnings. Dylan, Anderson and Lee’s youngest son, is a model who’s worked with brands like Acne Studios, Armani Exchange, Coach, Dolce & Gabbana, Hugo Boss, and True Religion. Brandon is also a member of the duo Motel 7 with musician Anton Khabbaz. The band’s 2021 single, “Are We There Yet,” was directed by Paris Brosnan, the son of actor Pierce Brosnan.
In 2022, Pamela and Tommy’s life and sex tape scandal was made into a series Pam & Tommy, in which Lily James played Anderson and Sebastian Stan played Lee. A source told Us Weekly in January 2023 that Pamela released her Netflix documentary, Pamela, A Love Story, because of how the biopic “sensationalized” her life. “The Hulu series played a huge role in Pam deciding to share her story,” the insider said. “She hated how sensationalized the story was and wanted to be able to tell hers from the beginning.”
In an interview with Variety in January 2023, Pamela revealed that she “refused” to watch the series. “It was just shocking,” she said. “Tommy probably thought it was funny. I remember Tommy writing me a note saying, ‘Don’t let this hurt you like it did the first time,’ because he had heard through the kids that I was kind of struggling with the idea of bringing this all up again. I don’t think he was portrayed kindly. I just know that I refuse to watch it.”
She also called the creators of the series “assholes.” “Salt on the wound. … You still owe me a public apology.” she said. “It just looked like a Halloween costume to me.” Still, she told Variety that she didn’t have anything negative against James and even invited her to the premiere of her documentary in January 2023. “I said to Netflix, ‘I’d love to invite Lily to the premiere of the movie,’” Pamela said. “I think it’s hard to play somebody when you don’t know the whole picture. I’ve got nothing against Lily James. I think that she’s a beautiful girl and she was just doing the job. But the idea of the whole thing happening was just really crushing for me.”
She also explained to Variety why she didn’t consider herself a “victim” by what happened to her by Pam & Tommy or anything else in her life. “I’m not a victim, and I’m not the damsel in distress,” Pamela said. “I’ve made my choices in my life. Some obviously were made for me, but I’ve always been able to find myself again. And it’s created a strong person and a strong parent.”
Love, Pamela by Pamela Anderson
For more about Pamela Anderson, read her 2023 book, Love, Pamela. The memoir takes readers through Anderson’s life and career, from her childhood as a deeply shy daughter of unprepared parents in Vancouver Island to how she became the blonde bombshell she’s known as today and found herself on the cover of magazines, sets of movies, arms of rockstars and the halls of the Playboy Mansion. The book, which is described as “honest, layered and unforgettable,” also explores how, as Anderson’s star rose, she lost control of her own narrative and became the subject of the tabloids and paparazzi who crafted a public perception of her she no longer recognized. In Love, Pamela, Anderson “breaks the mold of the celebrity memoir while taking back the tale that has been crafted about her.”
Pam & Tommy is available to stream on Hulu. Here’s how to watch it for free.
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